Monday, October 15, 2007

Dear Lady at Indigent Care Program,

I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed our conversation this afternoon. It was so very enlightening. First, I am honored with the fact that your office, without any request or prompting, contacted me and asked me to fill out an application to see if you could help with my latest medical expenses. That was so very thoughtful of you.

Oh, and I had so much fun spending two hours answering all of the questions on the 4 page application. Front and back. Thank you for that. I was trying to figure out what to do with that block of time. :-) And, I really didn't have anything to do during the half hour I spoke with you on the phone. I will always treasure our pleasant conversation.

I also want to thank you for showing me the error of my ways. You are so right, the fact that I am unmarried, and have no illegitimate children, gives me no right to think that I can be considered a homemaker. After all, I have never cleaned a house, made any kind of repairs, or attempts at organization. I have never fixed a meal for my family, scrubbed a floor on my hands and knees, kissed a child's "boo-boo", taught a child to tie their shoes, made a bed, made curtains for the home, stayed awake most of the night with a sick child, scrubbed a toilet, made appointments or important phone calls for others in the home (since they were out working a REAL job). I have never changed a diaper, taught a child to walk/talk, potty trained a child, mended even one piece of clothing, or wrapped a single birthday/Christmas gift.

Shame on me for actually believing homeschooling a child and building their character is actually worth more than getting a "real" job that pays money. Their integrity, and building a better future for our country, "be damned".

I want to thank you for bringing the fact that I have "free loaded" off of my family long enough, and that I should grow up and move on with my life. Your right, it is my choice to have the role of the "homemaker" in my family, therefore I must accept the consequences of my actions/choices.

Thank you, again, Ma'am. I will close this letter now, because my soap opera is back on, and my Bon Bons are beginning to melt.

Your Truly,
Wendy Darling


Princess LadyBug said...

Personally, I think you went kind of lightly on her. A woman with an IQ as low as hers obviously is wouldn't grasp the subtle nuances of sarcasm. After all she was probably educated by the local public school system.

WendyDarling said...

Thank you, Princess. :-) Unfortunately, she will probably never read this, since this is where I chose to express my thoughts/feelings. Instead of actually telling her off.

Laslo Hollyfield said...

Dam^ the Man!!! Save the Empire!!!

WendyDarling said...

LOL... I like that movie too, Laslo :-) Thank you. :-)

Cleggy said...

Awesome post.

You see? If I'd helped you with writing this when you asked me to, it wouldn't have come out near this good.

We'll make a writer out of you yet. One of us should be one; might as well be you.

After all, the only other thing you have to do is watch your soap operas and eat Bon Bons.


WendyDarling said...

I LOVE your comment, Cleggy. :-) Thank you. And if I ever do become a writer it will be because I learned everything from you. :-)

I am off to finish laundry and get dressed to go to the gym, because all of these Bon Bons are starting to put the inches back on the hips.

Julie said...

There is something seriouly wrong with this country.